By Linda S. Pucci, Ph.D.
I’m a believer in life-time learning, and I have really pushed myself to learn new ways of practicing as a coach and psychologist. Maybe it’s because I get bored if I just stay doing the same thing over and over.
I actually love learning new techniques and, stretching myself. Is it comfortable? Not one bit!
When you stretch yourself, you learn so much about yourself. You can learn your strengths as well as your weaknesses, and you can have the opportunity to develop new capabilities.
Learning is really a four-step process. First is the period where you don’t even know that you don’t know–called Unconscious Incompetence. You don’t know that you don’t know something and need to learn.
After you’ve been learning awhile, you become aware of what you don’t know–that’s called Conscious Incompetence.
Next, you become aware consciously of what you need to know, and that’s called Conscious Competence. That’s where you’re learning new skills, but they feel awkward and unfamiliar.
Finally, you develop Unconscious Competence, where the new skill becomes part of your familiar repertoire and you don’t even have to think about it.
Usually when you are stretching yourself to learn something new, or DO something new, you are developing conscious competence in it. You’re learning all you need to know about this unfamiliar concept or unfamiliar behavior.
By the way, that’s almost ALWAYS an uncomfortable period, and one which challenges you to get right up against YOUR STUFF, no matter what it that “stuff” is.
Is it fear? Is it self-consciousness? Is it failure? Whatever it is, it will challenge you. When you rise to meet that challenge, you will not only GROW, you’ll TRANSFORM your life. Once you develop Unconscious Competence, no matter what area it is in, your life changes exponentially.
Learning how to drive is a perfect example of that whole learning process. When I was going to learn how to drive, I thought, “This ought to be pretty easy. Just point the car down the road.” I didn’t even know what I didn’t know (unconscious incompetence).
Then my dad started to teach me, and I discovered that I KNEW I didn’t know what I was doing, and how hard this was going to be (conscious incompetence).
Next I practiced and practiced and practiced, and although there was a lot to remember, I managed to learn and get my license (conscious competence).
Of course, the longer I’ve driven (over 40 years now), the less I have to think about it. It comes automatically (unconscious competence). The acquisition of the skill of driving has, of course, transformed my ability to do a lot of things. Being able to drive gave me freedom and autonomy and the capability to go where I want to go, when I want to go there. Learning to drive was BIG. But it was also a big stretch.
As a coach, one of the things I consider to be absolutely essential in my job is the ability to help people stretch themselves. I’ll often ask my client to do things that may not be completely comfortable for them. Why do I do that? Not to make them feel incompetent.
When they stretch themselves and do something that is outside their comfort zone, I know they will develop capabilities they didn’t think they had. To my way of thinking, that’s one of the most powerful gifts a person can give themselves.
© 2012 Linda S. Pucci, Ph.D.
Linda Pucci, Ph.D. is a psychologist, life coach, trainer and owner of Inner Resource Center, LLC in Maryville, TN. She has more than 33 years of experience helping people overcome obstacles and self-sabotage by using her solution focused approach. She is dedicated to helping people find the resources they need to transform their lives. Learn more about the things that can make a difference in your life by signing up for Linda’s Inner Resources report.
